By: Matt Hutcheson
Most people have been there at some point in their lives; You have recently split up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, and you want your ex back. Most people will just accept the situation and try to forget about that person and move on. But what if you don't want to, or you can't move on? You are still in love with that person and don't want to be apart from them. If you are in this situation, you need good ex back advice that will stop you from making the same mistakes as everyone else, and show you exactly how you can get your ex back.
Luckily for you, 95% of all break-ups are totally reversible. It doesn't matter who dumped who, how long ago the relationship ended or what happened to cause the break-up, you can get them back even if they are already seeing somebody else.
If the break-up was quite recent and they are already with someone else, more than likely this person is just a rebound that your ex is using to try and get over you. If you really want to get your ex back, you have to make them realize how much they miss you and that this new person isn't right for them. Make them remember all the good times you had together, and how in love with you they were. Below you can find a simple 5 step plan to help you achieve just that.
Step 1: You must accept and come to terms with the break-up. At the moment this person is now your ex boyfriend or girlfriend and you must accept it. The worst thing you can do is act like a child about the break-up and refuse to accept it, begging them to take you back. Once you face up to the face that you are no longer together, you can start to move on from the break-up and start working on winning them back.
Step 2: You have got to heal. Before you can even start thinking about trying to get back together with your ex, you have to heal from the break-up and the pain it has caused you. Breaking up with the person that you love is horrible and can really affect you emotionally, and it can affect how you function from day to day. But you have to move past this point if you are serious about getting your ex back. If you skip this step, and don't heal properly from the breakup, even if you get back together with that person, the relationship is likely to fail again pretty quickly, because you didn't deal with the pain and the emotional hurt the break-up caused you. The best way to do this is to simply open up to someone and tell them exactly how you feel and what you are going through. If you share this with a close friend or family member, they can help you. This may be embarrassing for you, but it is really important.
Step 3: Okay, you have now come to terms with and healed from the breakup. Now you can start to reconnect with your ex. This is the part where a lot of people make the biggest mistake. They try to do too much, too fast and want their ex to take them back almost immediately. It doesn't work like that. You need to be more subtle than that. What you have to do is make your ex remember and think about all the good things about you and why she loved you. You should be really warm and friendly with them, without acting like you are trying to get them back. If you show them that you are good fun to be around and that you are a good friend, they will start to think about why they liked being with you in the first place, and that they miss being with you when you were being this really nice, friendly person. Whatever you do, don't become really needy and clingy, as all this will do is put them off you more. Don't start sending them endless text messages or phone calls, and don't try and “accidentally” run into them at their favourite restaurants or bars. All this will do is make you look like a stalker. You have to show your ex that you are strong and are not dependant on them, that you are fine on your own and have confident in yourself. This will show your ex that you are just going to fall apart without them and will force them to think that they made a mistake in breaking up with you.
Step 4: You have reconnected with your ex and they are starting to have doubts about whether they made the right decision in ending the relationship. They are starting to think about you more and that they may want to get back together with you. Now you have to reinforce that feeling. The best way to do this is to show them that you are not ready to move on and that you don't want to just forget about your relationship. The last thing you want to do is start seeing someone else, even if it is just a fling. Many people think that if you make your ex jealous by seeing someone else, they will want you back. But more often than not, all this will do is show them that you have moved on and don't want to give the relationship another go. If you stay single, you are showing them that you aren't ready to give up on the relationship and that you aren't ready to move on. They will soon realize that you were good together and that it is worth giving it another try.
Step 5: Up to this point you have subtly forced your ex to give the relationship another try. Now you have got to make sure that all you efforts up to this point haven't been wasted, and make sure the relationship lasts this time. The relationship failed the first time for a reason. Whatever that reason may be, or there could be a couple of reasons, you have got to learn from them and make sure that they don't happen again. Make it clear to your now partner again, that you want to work on the problems you had in the past and are willing to change to make the relationship work. If you manage to do this you can leave the breakup where it belongs, in the past.
Without the right information and advice getting your ex back can be really difficult. But with the right help you can almost guarantee that you ex will at least give you another chance, and you canake it last this time.
If you really want to get your ex back you need good advice and a well thought out plan. The 5 step plan above will have your ex practically begging you to take them back
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