Why People Dont Want to Get Married

By admin / October 16, 2007
By: James Walsh
Category: Divorce

The situation in the is particularly striking in this context. Over the past seven years, cohabitation rates have gone up by more than 50% while marriage rates have reached an all time low in the 2005 census. According to the Office of National Statistics, this trend has only grown stronger over the past two years. The number of divorces has also fallen as fewer people have got married in the first place. But why are people not wishing to get married or stay married? Some of the reasons have been analysed below.

Fear of Divorce

It is true that the is referred to as the divorce capital of the world. It is not entirely a derogatory epithet. This country offers some of the best legal services, expert financial planning, and a streamlined and fair judgement. Needless to say, the picture is not as sunny as it sounds. There are a great many problems on the road to divorce. A complicated case can drag on for years, even a fair case can result in a nightmare. The maintenance money may never arrive, a parent may be denied visitation rights on flimsy grounds, a case that began amicably might turn into a war field. The best way to make a mess of your life is to get a divorce. And the best way to stop it is by not marrying at all.

Marriage and Career

The marital age in the is rising - and this too has been a continuous trend. The basic reason for this is the time taken for an average man or woman in this country to build a viable career. By the time one is able to afford an apartment on loan or afford to plan for a family, one is already in the mid thirties. Marriage follows and the career built up so painstakingly goes for a toss if the marriage runs into a rough patch. Women cannot afford the insecurity of leaving a job in order to raise kids. If the marriage is annulled, the home and husband won't be there - but the kids would still have to be fed. No matter how harsh this sounds, this is how reality is.

Fear of Commitment and Responsibility

Those who get married want to make a statement of their commitment. And those who don't want the responsibility to descend suddenly on their shoulders like a heavy burden do not want to enter into wedlock. This is not merely a result of moral degradation and the thought of feckless young people. It is not possible to devote time and money in a manner that would do justice to a family very easily in the today. Education, food, housing, everything is costly, and the lifestyle demands of the cities are very high. It is better not to commit than to break the commitment later on.

Loss of Personal Freedom

It is not always possible to seamlessly fit into each other's lives when both partners are in their late thirties. Marrying someone would always mean a degree of compromise, a lot of adjustment and a great deal of mutual understanding. Those who are getting married need to remember that they are responsible for the family, and have duties towards it. The charming freedom of a bachelor life would be over the moment one has a spouse. This is not acceptable to a lot of people who do not want to get tied down to only one person. Once again, if we consider all these people to be Casanovas, it would be an over simplification. There are many who actually believe in a philosophy of free love and consider marriage to be an imposition. Besides, marriage would also bring in certain lifestyle regulations, which is not wanted always.

Bad Experience from Previous Marriages

It has been noted that if a marriage manages to get beyond the first eight years, it has more chances of surviving for life. The rate of remarriages has gone up massively in the , but so have multiple divorces. The scenario is even worse with cohabitation, where partners are falling apart even faster. The bitter experience of previous affairs is keeping away a lot of people who believe in "once bitten, twice shy'. This applies to both marriage and cohabitation, and even to same sex couples.

James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more about a solicitor managed divorce see http://www.managed-divorce.co.uk





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